No nobler calling

'Of women and mothers, President Gordon B. Hinckley once said:

“We must never lose sight of the strength of the women. … It is mothers who most directly affect the lives of their children. … It is mothers who nurture them and bring them up in the ways of the Lord. Their influence is paramount. …

“… They are the creators of life. They are the nurturers of children. They are the teachers of young women. They are our indispensable companions. They are our co-workers in building the kingdom of God. How great is their role, how marvelous their contribution.”^5'

Read more of this inspiring talk here!

This quote from Elaine S. Dalton's talk touched me more deeply than anything else said at that general conference. One of the quandries looming in my mind before conference had been all the whens, wheres, whys and hows of going back to work when my maternity leave runs out. I knew it was an inevitable truth that I would have to face, but I didn't know how the Lord wanted me to face it. My role as a mother and my role as a nurse felt like they would surely be competing with one another, while all I wanted was for both to exist in harmony. I didn't know how this would be possible. Listening to this talk was literally like sunshine dispersing clouds, erasing all doubt and confusion. I'm so grateful that my Father in Heaven knew what I needed to hear. What I needed to hear was so much more than the words that were spoken.

I needed to hear that a nurse is a high and noble calling, but that of a mother is the highest and noblest of all. I needed to hear that in a world that minimizes the importance of  a mother being at home with her children, my children would have a greater need to know that motherhood was not old fashioned or outdated, but eternal and irreplaceable. I needed to hear that my daughter(s) would need an example of a mother that  placed loving and nurturing her children above any earthly pursuit, so that they too would do the same. I needed to hear that working as a nurse was important and advancing my skills and knowledge was encouraged, but that it must never take precedence over careful and present parenting. I needed to hear that I may need to sacrifice a job that I wanted for one that was more conducive to my family's needs. I need a job to fit my family, not a family to fit my job.

Some may think that this is my throwing away 4 years of university education and a valuable career, for motherhood cannot intellectually compete with acute care nursing. True, my days are filled with simpler tasks than they used to be. I wear the hat of bottle maker, diaper changer, drool wiper, puke catcher, smile initiator, tickle monster, nap enforcer, bath giver, play partner, song singer, book reader, tear stopper. They don't require complex mathematical calculations, thorough documentation, the constant assessment and evaluation of rapidly changing physical and emotional crises. They do require complete selflessness and love 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year for unnumbered years...a more demanding task than any earthly occupation I know of.

Growing up, we didn't have the most expensive brand-name clothes, the most elaborate family vacations, or my parents wallet opening at every whim and wish. Love wasn't spelt m-o-n-e-y. Love was spelt T-I-M-E. No matter what our family circumstances were, I always knew that my mother would do all in her power to give this time to my sisters and I, even if it meant taking a lesser paying job to be home when we were home, to talk to us, laugh with us and even occasionally lecture us. Even living 300 km away and married with a baby of my own, this has never, and I know it will never change. In our day, this may be viewed as a form of weakness. But to me, her choice to sacrifice so many personal wants and needs to be present and supportive in all ways and at all times in my life was strength not weakness. It's because of her example that I know this is how I want to raise my children.

I don't want any mother, who because of their personal circumstances chooses a different path than this, to be offended by what I have written. I know each family's situation is unique to them and only they can truly know what is best for their children. But this is my conviction: to not allow any worldy aspiration to invade my family's right to a mother who knows her place is at home nurturing her children and teaching them about this beautiful world Heavenly Father has given them. They may not wear the fanciest clothes, eat the fanciest meals, or go the fanciest places but they will know that they have a mother who will sit with them, talk with them, laugh with them, cry with them, play with them, discover with them, and love them with a love that has no boundaries.

Though I can touch the lives of 1000 patients, if I do not succeed in touching my children's  lives, I will have failed the most important and eternal responsibility ever bestowed upon me.

"No other success can compensate for failure in the home." -David O. McKay